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Censorship Alert! Google Introduces Localized Domains For Blogspot

2012-02-01T08:20:00.000-08:00

Google has introduced local domains for its popular blogging service. This means that this Blogspot blog will be viewed at, 'canadu.blogspot.com' in most of the world, but if you are seeing it in India it will be, 'canadu.blogspot.in.' The reason that Goog's is doing this is so that they can restrict access to blogs on a country by country basis. It is similar to a move that Twitter recently made to be able to block access should a government request it to do so. Web 3.0 will no doubt be a place of walls and barriers.

More: http://www.medianama.com/2012/02/223-google-redirects-indian-blogger-visitors-to-blogspot-in-domains-to-enable-censorship/

And Now An NPD Leadership Poll...

2012-02-01T07:58:00.001-08:00

Naked Women Made Me Do It!

2012-01-31T07:35:00.000-08:00

Mexico seems to be becoming an increasingly dangerous place for tourists...

Jose Ramon Acosta Quintero has been arrested for breaking every bone in the face of a Calgary woman. He says this has happened to him before. He claims that after getting drunk and high on coke he's run into naked women who spurn his advances so he beats them. Such as with the Canadian when he got on an elevator with her at the Hotel Riu Emerald Bay in the Mexican resort town of Mazatlan. His excuse differs from the standard rape defense of looking at lingerie pics in the Sears catalogue made me do it.

Welcome Socialists!

2012-01-28T08:06:00.000-08:00

A couple left blogs are linking to me for some reason. The latest is YaYaCanada. It must be because I write posts titled...

-No Blood For Afghan Oil!
-The Revolution Is Coming!
-Alec Baldwin: Hero Of The Revolution!
-My Twitter Correspondence With Elizabeth May
and, my favourite...
-Rick Mercer Promotes Homosexuality To Catholic School Kids!

If you think I'm in the Occupy movement, that's fine with me. As a for all you know New Democrat I'd like to say that the NDP leadership race is highly offensive. What we need to head the party is a black lesbian albino parapeligic with tourettes.

Also check out the Jew hate on YaYaCanada. In the comments of the post that linked to me...

M. Rocknest said...

Might I suggest it would be Harpo's yamulka which would fly off in similar circumstances? Enjoy your blog Yaya -- you certainly have our little Stevie Blunder (PM) pegged correctly.

yayacanada said...

M. Rocknest: Thanks for the comment and the kind words. Now you've got me wondering if the purpose of the wig is to hide the kippah.

Crazed Cat Takes Over Air Canada Jet!

2012-01-26T08:03:00.000-08:00

http://goo.gl/53nLu

Ripples is in custody after holding an Air Canada jet hostage for four hours yesterday. Passengers on the Halifax to Toronto flight spent a tense morning as officials negotiated with the cat who eventually allowed everyone to deboard. It is unknown at this time what Ripple's demands were but, like most other feline terrorists, it probably had something to do with wanting more canned food and less dry food.

More: http://outheretoo.blogspot.com/2012/01/air-canada-abomination.html

Thomas Mulcair Idolizes Serial Killer!

2012-01-25T09:06:00.000-08:00

"I have a barrett. It has a red star on it. It's a Che Guevara barrett." - Thomas Mulcair (NDP leadership hopeful) on the CBC show, '22 Minutes,' last night.

"Crazy with fury I will stain my rifle red while slaughtering any enemy that falls in my hands! My nostrils dilate while savoring the acrid odor of gunpowder and blood. With the deaths of my enemies I prepare my being for the sacred fight and join the triumphant proletariat with a bestial howl!" - Che Guevara.

"Hatred as an element of struggle; unbending hatred for the enemy, which pushes a human being beyond his natural limitations, making him into an effective, violent, selective, and cold-blooded killing machine. This is what our soldiers must become … " - Che Guevara.

More on Che: http://www.therealcuba.com/MurderedbyChe.htm

Arab Spring Comes To Waterloo!

2012-01-24T08:42:00.000-08:00

The series of revolutions that started last year, overthrowing dictatorships, have finally made their way to Waterloo, Ontario.

Parking lot at Research In Motion on Monday Morning.

After growing dissent over their iron grip on power, Jim Balsillie and Mike Lazaridis have both stepped down. It is unclear whether they will flee any mob justice and try to seek refuge at Apple or Microsoft and it is also unknown whether those companies would even give them amnesty.

Thorsten Heins has been named new leader. Unelected, he has already promised that there will be no major changes. Is this the equivalent of the Muslim Brotherhood taking over Egypt?

Qatar Is Racist!

2012-01-24T08:25:00.000-08:00

A recent episode of, '60 Minutes' had nothing but good things to say about Qatar, the richest country on earth. http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=7395216n But what about racism and even slavery in the Gulf sheikdom? The tiny nation imports thousands of foreign workers to do the jobs no Qatari wants to do.

Here are some links:

“Ninety-four percent of workers are migrants in Qatar. It’s basically modern slavery.” http://www.proreferee.com/2011/11/unions-warn-fifa-of-modern-slavery-in-qatar/

Segregated malls: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VluY5SWfjSI

http://www.qatarliving.com/node/269936

Migrant Rights: http://www.migrant-rights.org/2009/11/22/leading-qatari-paper-prints-a-racist-cartoon/

"You will never meet any serious racism...until you live in the Gulf. What problems you think you have had in the good old UK will pale into insignificance when you meet the Gulf Arabs." http://community.tes.co.uk/forums/p/393543/5387997.aspx

North Korea's Still On Facebook?

2012-01-20T07:46:00.000-08:00

I remember back in 2010 the DPRK joined Twitter and then Facebook. I recall Facebook shutting them down saying that their site is for individuals to social network not rogue nations to share propaganda. They-y-y're ba-a-ack!!! http://www.facebook.com/pages/Uriminzok/105013712892902

2012-01-19T07:59:00.000-08:00

To protest SOPA Wikipedia, along with some other websites, shut down for 24 hours. For one day this blog became one of the only concise sources for info on all things Canadian. If you are a student who lives somewhere other than Canada and you have a research paper due on this country, you might want to check here...

Learn about the time Dick Cheney invaded the Great White North: http://canadu.blogspot.com/2011/09/dick-cheney-invades-canada.html

Or read about how a little girl with a stop sign protest sign overthrew the Harper government: http://canadu.blogspot.com/2011/06/canada-in-turmoil-as-harper-government.html

You can find out facts like who the president of Canada is and about the polar bear hunt that takes place just outside of Toronto every year: http://canadu.blogspot.com/2011/11/learn-more-about-canada.html

And wonder whether the entire nation will one day become a giant nudist resort: http://canadu.blogspot.com/2011/07/canada-to-become-giant-nudist-resort-by.html

Justin Trudeau Decides To Go Through With Assisted Suicide!

2012-01-19T07:20:00.000-08:00

At age 40 news that Justin Trudeau has decided to end his life comes as a shock and surprise. We're unsure of exactly what degenerative disease the son of the former Prime Minister, Pierre Trudeau, is suffering from. Justin has chosen a quick and painless death: On March 31rst he will step into a boxing ring and fight Senator Patrick Brazeau. You can make a donation to the Ottawa Regional Cancer Foundation in Justin's memory here: http://www.ottawacancer.ca/en/courage-campaign/ways-to-give/individuals.aspx

NASA Suspects Stephen Harper Is The AntiChrist!

2012-01-17T07:42:00.000-08:00

After years of punching holes in the atmosphere with toxin spewing billion dollar rockets, NASA has gone all environmentalist. They're so green now that they no longer pollute the air over Cape Canaveral. That's because the space shuttle program has moved to Russia...

Artist's depiction of America's current space program.

From their offices (probably now located in Sverdlovsk), they have been coming up with scientific studies showing that Canada will be the epicenter of climate change. Logically, ever since Stephen Harper won a majority government, walked out on Kyoto, and now supports ethical oil, Armageddon will begin in Alberta.

If, 'The Omen' trilogy were real Damian wouldn't die in the end: He'd become Prime Minister of Canada.

More: http://mooseandsquirrel.ca/2012/01/16/11:55/shorter-nasa-on-agw-blame-canada/

Homosexual Hates Stephen Harper!

2012-01-17T07:15:00.000-08:00

Gay columnist Dan Savage had some choice words on how he thought the Harper Conservatives would backtrack on foreigners having had same-sex marriages in Canada, leaving Savage's own wedding in legal limbo. He described Harper as a, "Mother fxxxxx." ...Wait. They let him print that? In his column? And it's syndicated nationwide???

Anyway. I think the real news here is that the kid from 'The Wonder Years,' is now a gay middle-aged man who swears at foreign heads of state.

Liberals Get Stoned, Elect Steve Buscemi As Party President!

2012-01-16T09:22:00.000-08:00

New Liberal boss Steve Buscemi hasn't aged much
since 1996's, 'Fargo.'

Mackenzie King, St. Laurent, and Pearson would be dismayed to learn that the Libs are now Canada's party of pot. Trudeau would be thrilled. But in an even stranger move, Canada's third party has apparently made American actor Steve Buscemi their new president. What's next? Will Pauly Shore now take Rae's job as leader?

Liberal Convention Proves Libs Do Have a Sense Of Humour!

2012-01-14T10:20:00.000-08:00

Ben Mulroney

I asked Justin Trudeau a pretty important question via Twitter a couple days ago and he responded in due time. It was something that I had been wondering about for quite awhile. It was: "Do people ever come up to you and say: 'Wow! It's Ben Mulroney?' " His answer to this was confounding: "Actually happens to each of us from time to time. Much hilarity always ensues..."

It doesn't even make sense! Is he saying that I, too, get mistaken for Ben Mulroney? Because I don't. This is not a funny comeback. He should have said something like: "Well...They don't mistake me for Regis Philbin," or, "Is Ben Mulroney Dermot Mulroney's son?" but he didn't. So I began to think the reason the Liberal Party had gone downhill is because of their lack of humour. But Bob Rae proves this isn't true.

At this weekend's convention everything Rae says is a riot! Leaving people laughing and laughing, he is part politician and part stand up comic. Using absurdest humour he threatened to rebuild the Grits and win a majority government in 2015! Coverage of this should be on Comedy Central.

It wasn't all funny, though. The politician formerly known as, 'Iggy,' opened for Rae. Claiming that he didn't know who Peter Newman was, he minced words and lamented on the fact that he never became a star. To take a stab at Rae now being the big cheese, he insisted that the next big act would really be an unknown Young Liberal. But thankfully, Iggy has taken the whole, "Rise up, rise up!" thing out of his performance.

Be sure to catch some of this on the news channels today because much hilarity is ensuing.

Tony Clement Has Spat With Teen!

2012-01-11T09:29:00.000-08:00

Tony Clement has apologized for calling a 15-year-old boy a, "jack ass," on Twitter. The whole thing happened because the boy was criticizing Clement's choice of spelling. He shot back that the kid was also using colloquialisms and then referred to him as a male donkey. This is the second time that this has happened as last year the treasury board president referred to a director from the Young Liberals as a jack ass. However, it should be pointed out that Clement is right. People who harp on grammar and Young Liberals on the social networking site are, infact, jack asses. What is the point of Twitter if adults can't use it to make fun of stupid teenagers?

Instead of this...

Twitter: Follow your interests

or

Twitter: Yours to discover

the new slogan should be...

Twitter: Giving adults the chance to ridicule dumb teens

No apologies needed, Mr. Clement. However, if you are NDP Winnipeg MP Pat Martin and you use Twitter to swear at a Catholic priest, than you're going straight to hell.

Rex Murphy Is A Racist!

2012-01-08T10:54:00.000-08:00

Equal rights for everybody is dangerous thinking. Especially when you want to give equal rights to white men. Despite the fact that he works for the CBC, Rex Murphy had this to say...

This evolution of the law – if we can call it that – is not confined to strict matters of criminal enforcement. We see a shadow system of laws that have varying application in the whole human-rights apparatus in Canada. There we find that there are categories of people (sexual, racial, religious) for whom remedy against “offensive” behaviour is promised. Belong to one of the designated categories and a kind of justice is available for you, via the tribunals and commissions, by virtue of your category. You will be supported financially in seeking your “rights.” Fall outside the categories, however, and you are very much on your own.

In some cases, your solitude will be found in a hospital bed: Consider Sam Gualtieri, the white Caledonia-area contractor who was smashed with a two-by-four by Richard Smoke, an aboriginal man squatting in a residence where Mr. Gualtieri was working. The sentencing judge obeyed the Supreme Court of Canada by taking into account the collective experience of native peoples – the result of which was imposing on Smoke what almost everyone believes to be an extremely lenient sentence. [...]

However these historical situations came to be, whatever the benign intentions behind setting up our two tier legal system, its ultimate effect is to delegitimize the law in the eyes of Canadians.

This is crazy talk and it looks like Rex is probably going to have to clean out his desk at the CBC. His line of thought is unacceptable. If you go to university you'll learn that everything early explorers said about natives (that they suffered from starvation, were in constant wars with other tribes, and that they engaged in cannibalism) is false because Europeans could only see things from a primitive European perspective, failing to understand the advanced ways of the Indians. Before white people came along they lived in a utopian society that could have voted NDP and driven Volvos if they wanted to but chose to run free with nature instead. And all of that was taken away from them.

A white man contemplates what Indians were like before Europeans got here.

Occupy Moncton Is A One Person Army!

2012-01-08T10:26:00.000-08:00

As it got cold and protesters went home the Occupy movement in Moncton, New Brunswick, dwindled down to one person. Matt Burden is a one man army intent on taking on the 1%, protesting mostly by himself. Will they give in? Last year Michael Moore gave the little girl with stop sign protest sign who held up parliament, a job. Why can't a 1%er like Moore do the same for this lonely soul? He could clean Moore's pool and warm up his Lexus on cold days.

Michael Moore's house: http://www.celebritynetworth.com/articles/celebrity-homes/michael-moore-house-lakeside-mansion/

Mexico Declares War On Canadian Tourists!

2012-01-07T08:58:00.000-08:00

2012 is still young and already Canadian tourists are getting killed in Mexico. 1.6 million of us went there last year and more are expected to go now because of all of the craziness surrounding the Mayan end of world prediction. Now comes word that they're turning people away at customs who have blemished passports. If it is only slightly wrinkled on the outside you may be on a plane heading back north at your own expense.

A curious move by a country that obviously doesn't want our tourist dollars. After all of the PR problems that they're having with a skyrocketing crime rate and an ongoing drug war, they do this. Other places that didn't predict the end of the world 1000 years ago also want our tourism. Go to Turks and Caicos instead.

This Isn't News!

2012-01-04T09:17:00.001-08:00

http://www.mississauga.com/news/article/1252076--canada-post-employee-caught-urinating-in-public

How is this news? This is a country of lumberjacks and polar bear hunters. Our postal workers should be allowed to urinate wherever they want and give anybody who looks the finger!

Liberals Want To Usurp The Throne?

2012-01-04T09:00:00.000-08:00

Proving that the Liberals are now taking their place among fringe parties, the youth wing has tabled a motion to get rid of Queen Elizabeth as our head of state. This will be debated at their convention in Ottawa this month.

Probable location for Liberal meeting.

Getting rid of the monarchy goes against recent opinion polls showing that a majority of Canadians want to keep these ties to Britain. It is really a move to counter how the Harper government has been boosting the royal image. There is a simple reason why Conservatives love the crown...

If the Liberals were to ever seize power and we had no monarch to protect us from them the House of Trudeau would ascend to power and take their place on the throne. We don't need Justin Trudeau as the new Lord Protector.

The Solid Snake Of The Revolutionary War...

2012-01-03T08:25:00.000-08:00

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Samuel_Whittemore

2011-12-30T07:27:00.000-08:00

A bizarre scene as a 1976 Lincoln limo carries a huge portrait of Kim Jong-il during the funeral procession.

Many things could be said about this. But boy, this is one sad day for Ford!

Americans Are Beginning To Admit That Canada Won The War Of 1812!

2011-12-29T08:52:00.000-08:00

After acknowledging that the War of 1812 happened in a recent PBS documentary, Americans are finally coming to terms with the fact that they lost. Maybe one day Canada will no longer have to ban Walt Disney productions for their unfair portrayal of Loyalists: http://flintlockandtomahawk.blogspot.com/2009/07/disneys-swamp-fox.html

A monument to fallen Canadian troops is now being planned in upstate New York. It will be at the location of the Battle of Sacket's Harbor. You can read more here: http://blogs.northcountrypublicradio.org/inbox/2011/12/26/morning-read-belated-respect-for-brits-canadians-buried-in-sackets-harbor/

Canadian Newsmaker Of The Year

2011-12-29T08:21:00.000-08:00

Usually at about this time the Canadian Press chooses the Canadian Newsmaker of the Year. It is almost always Stephen Harper but, this year the honour went to the late Jack Layton.

We gave up long ago paying attention to this and name our own Canadian Newsmaker in this blog. The award has always gone to Howard Hesseman.

However, the Hesseman dynasty ends today. Since Howard doesn't have any erotic pics of himself up on the internet, we lost interest. This year we choose Aliaa Magda Elmahdy...

...as greatest Canadian Newsmaker for taking it all off and posting to her blog to speak out against Islam's repression of women.

People of Egypt: Over here it's not frowned upon when pretty bloggers want to post pictures of themselves on the net in the name of expression. The differences between our cultures are just too vast!

What Happened To @OccupyPyongYang?

2011-12-23T08:10:00.000-08:00

After much hesitation I finally joined the Occupy movement. It was the death of Dear Leader Kim Jong-il that inspired me to do so...

http://thefrogman.me/post/14441408272/kim-jong-il-1941-2011-supreme-leader-and-chief?7328a640

So I started following @OccupyPyongYang on Twitter. But then they suddenly disappeared. So who disappeared them? Did Twitter bow down to pressure from the DPRK? I've been asking this for the past few days and nobody seems to know. But one place that needs an Occupy movement is certainly North Korea. Here's a link to an article that wonders where @OccupyPyongYang went, too: http://challengingduelism.tumblr.com/post/14663377579/what-happened-to-occupypyongyang In it the author asks that people tweet this:

#Twitter & #Google where is @OccupyPyongYang? #censorship #1pc

So lets get the Occupy movement going again but this time in places that need it.

The Evil Banana Conglomerate

2011-12-17T09:19:00.000-08:00

If Joseph Conrad's novel, 'Heart of Darkness,' had been about a banana corporation that company would be Chiquita. They've been accused of mistreating workers, violently putting down labour unrest, feeding corruption in Latin America, and using their ships to bring cocaine into the United States. In 2007 they were fined $25 million for their support of Colombian death squads. http://www.portfolio.com/news-markets/international-news/portfolio/2007/09/17/Chiquita-Death-Squads/

Now, as a move to appear 'ethical' to the American consumer, they've come out against Alberta's oil. They'll phase out shipping their banana's using our oil in favour of getting it from OPEC. Contact Chiquita via Facebook or Twitter to tell them you'll boycott them! http://twitter.com/#!/Chiquita and https://www.facebook.com/Chiquita Who needs their death bananas anyway?

Resort To Swearing When Kyoto Doesn't Work!

2011-12-16T08:37:00.000-08:00

A German newspaper, ' The Frankfurter Allgemeine Zeitung,' says that by pulling out of Kyoto, "Canada has revealed the farce behind the international agreement, which was more of an informal arrangement than a treaty with teeth." The accord was broken from the start with the former Liberal government failing to enact legislation to abide by after they originally signed onto it. By opting out, the Harper government has saved 14 billion dollars in penalties. Now we face international criticism from foreign governments like China and France, and from career delegates who love environmental summits because it gives them a chance to hobnob. But the worst criticism comes from home-from none other than Justin Trudeau. Trying to emulate the flash and grandeur of his late father, former Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau, Justin has resorted to swearing at Minister of the Environment, Peter Kent, in the House of Commons...

It's The 21rst Century And Witch Trials Are Still Taking Place!

2011-12-14T07:58:00.000-08:00

In this modern, high-tech world lawlessness rules supreme. Most countries no longer prosecute people for crimes of the occult. But there is one jurisdiction that stands alone against those in line with Satan: It is Saudi Arabia.

The Saudis have just beheaded a woman for being a witch, the second such execution for dabbling with dark forces since September. http://telchaination.blogspot.com/2011/12/saudi-witch-hunts-claim-another-victim.html

People of Saudi Arabia:

-The world is flat; not round. If it were round we'd all fall off.
-Also, don't let people take your photograph. What they're really doing is stealing your soul.
-Furthermore, if a Coke bottle were to fall from a passing airplane you minus well go ahead and worship it as your new god.

Canada Banning The Burka At Citizenship Ceremonies Is Not A Slam Against Islam!

2011-12-13T14:13:00.000-08:00

Muslim groups are upset as Ottawa has banned the wearing of the niqab and burka during citizenship oaths. Federal Citizenship, Immigration and Multiculturalism Minister Jason Kenney said that many women are being sworn in and can't be properly identified and it can't be established whether their lips are even moving during the oath taking event.

However, Muslims cannot victimize themselves over this because they are not the only ones affected. Now Canadians can rest easy that having to show your face at citizenship will prevent Darth Vader from ever becoming Canadian.

Figure Skater Hates Canada!

2011-12-09T09:25:00.000-08:00

Patrick Chan, in an interview with Reuters, declared that he is under appreciated by Canadians and feels that he has more fanfare in communist China. This went unnoticed by many because Chan does not play in the NHL but rather does what could be described as dancing to music while skating. In totalitarian countries like China they can dictate what sports people like.

Just look at the East German women's swim team: Nobody wanted to see that.

Chan has since apologized for his crazed outburst but, it is the opinion of this blogger that he should be placed on some sort of anti-red watch list just incase he's on the phone to Beijing a lot.

Twitter Steals Ontario's Slogan

2011-12-09T09:03:00.000-08:00

In coming up with a new slogan for a redesign of their mobile site http://fly.twitter.com/ Twitter has stolen what it says on Ontario licence plates.

The new look boasts photos and videos within conversations meaning that Twitter will finally be better than http://friedeggs.com/ which has a lowly PageRank of 2.

CO.CC Sites Are Back!

2011-12-09T08:42:00.000-08:00

After Google banned the free CO.CC domain from being indexed last summer, thus delisting all of the sites using it, they are now searchable once again. Google was rooting out spammers that used free subdomains.

I have a jury duty blog on CO.CC: http://www.gettingoutofjuryduty.co.cc/

Auditor General Says McGuinty Is Running Ontario Into The Ground!

2011-12-07T08:24:00.000-08:00

The Auditor General, Jim McCarter, has released a report critical of McGuinty's green energy projects. Aside from saying that Ontarians spend too much on auto insurance and alcohol, he predicts already high hydro bills will go up 220 million a year. McCarter states that billions of dollars have been approved without any oversight into the eventual cost and feasibility of green energy. http://cd989.com/2011/12/not-so-surprising/

Maybe we should all pitch green energy ideas to the McGuinty Liberals while they're still handing cash away...

We could get a satellite to beam solar energy down

to us in laser form. *This may also have

military applications.

What happened to the 'Cold Fusion' craze of 1989? Build

giant cold fusion reactors to replace ageing nuclear ones.

Run everything using 'Perpetual Motion.' And this one is so

obvious--Come on McGuinty: are you asleep at

the switch?

Pakistan Is Winning Its War Against Christians!

2011-12-06T07:25:00.000-08:00

After Shahbaz Bhatti, the Catholic minister of minority affairs, was murdered, Muslims in Pakistan further secured their brutal onslaught against Christians. The Punjab governor, Salman Taseer, called for calm so then they murdered him, too. The country has tough anti-blasphemy laws which are also vague and in place only to protect the dignity of some Muslim deity.

Possible Muslim deity (file photo)

A curious idiosyncrasy of the Pakistani legal system is that Christian girls are being raped by Muslim men, then the victim is thrown in jail for the infidelity, then they are only released on the condition that they marry their rapist, thus converting to Islam. This is but one of the ways that the minority Christian population is being purged. It also shows that premarital sex in Pakistan doesn't differ much from Cro-Magnon man where a girl would be grabbed by her hair and dragged back to a cave.

Animals In Headers?

2011-11-28T08:01:00.000-08:00

As Canada is set to pull out of Kyoto I ponder more advanced issues. Like what's with all of the conservative bloggers with cats in their headers?

http://blazingcatfur.blogspot.com/

http://thecanadiansentinel.blogspot.com/

But then I found this...

http://www.doggerelparty.ca/

Also, doing further research, I've come to the conclusion that backroom liberal hack Warren Kinsella and comedic actor Bill Murray are, infact, the same guy...

Can you tell them apart?

CBC New Home For Washed-Up Actors

2011-11-27T10:58:00.000-08:00

1980s actor Alan Thicke has been seen around the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation a number of times recently. This is raising concerns that the CBC is becoming a haven for washed-up or typecast Hollywood actors. Just last October Thicke starred in a, '22 Minutes' tribute to the 1980s and now there's talk that he will be in something called, 'Canada Reads' where he will probably review books written by Margaret Atwood.

At some point in the 1980s Thicke was in a sitcom which was rumoured to be successful. I'm familiar with the shows of that time and he wasn't in Cheers, WKRP in Cincinnati, Night Court, Cheers, Alf, The Cosby Show, or Cheers. So exactly what show was it?

If the CBC turns into a refuge for Canadian actors who can't make it in America anymore than expect to see more familiar faces of old on it. New programming could include David Foley, Chevy Chase (who is Canadian by association), Tom Green, Sarah Poley, and Devon Sawa. And whatever happened to that guy who use to be in the, 'Red/Green Show?' Does he do the weather on Buffalo news channel 4 now?

Learn More About Canada!

2011-11-26T10:49:00.000-08:00

Attention readers: As many of you are not from Canada here is a helpful introduction...

Canada is the second largest country in the world but only has a population of 3 million. So few people in a land so big dwarfed in the number of inhabitants by the U.S. to the south and those snooty Greenlanders to the east, has led to the outside world having a few misconceptions about the Great White North.

First off...

Toronto is not the capital of Canada!

This common belief stems from the fact that Toronto is our only city that has skyscrapers. Mississauga is the seat of power of the Canadian legislature. Also some people may refer to Toronto as being the capital because of its close proximity to Mississauga which, confusingly, is almost a suburb of T.O. but not quite.

Canada's Parliament

Sadly, in 1988, the Canadian parliament building was burned down by terrorists from the Front for the Liberation of Saskatchewan. Modern architecture is often somewhat lacking and many complain that the new building resembles a Rubick's cube.

Who's the leader of Canada?

The President of Canada is George 'Buddy' Shatner, brother to the better known actor William Shatner. Rumour is that President Buddy had wanted to be an actor when he was young but Bill was way better at Shakespeare than he was. Since Bill got the lead part in Star Trek so many years ago, the two siblings haven't spoken to each other ever since.

When William Shatner returns to Canada every year for the polar bear hunt, like clockwork President Buddy will board the presidential tug boat and sail up the St. Lawrence and go to Newfoundland because he doesn't want to run into his more famous brother.

President 'Buddy' Shatner

Canada's mighty air force

Few people know that Canada has one of the world's largest air forces. While outsiders may argue that our planes are antiquated and could not intercept a modern jet fighter, most have been fitted with modern avionics and sidewinder missiles.

Enemies will think twice before attacking when they realize that the Royal Canadian Air Force has over 800 DHC-2 Beaver float planes converted for military use.

Animal rights? Who cares?

A lot of people in the outside world know about the seal hunt, when Canadians head north to club baby seals to death. For some reason the foreign press never talks about the polar bear hunt. Every August hungry polar bears approach cities in search of food. Shooting them is the only humane thing to do as even most Canadian environmentalists agree that if they weren't killed they'd become a nuisance in our towns. After all: Nobody wants to get up in the morning, leave their house, and share the sidewalk with a polar bear! The hunt takes place every August just outside of Toronto.

Animal rights? Wait! There's more!

Everybody knows that hockey is the most popular sport in Canada. But there's another sport that's almost just as popular that you probably haven't heard about: It's the Annual Penguin March from Winnipeg to Edmonton. Last year the televised event drew in a larger audience than the Olympics and, aside from the coaches, all of the competitors aren't even human.

When the Penguins start their trek in Winnipeg expectations run pretty high. Almost every Canadian has their favourite. Last year I cheered for Snu Snu. Only one victorious penguin makes it to the Edmonton finishing line. By then the stragglers have all been shot in the back of their heads by disappointed coaches. I wouldn't feel too sorry for them because the prize that the winner gets is that he's broiled and served to the Queen and her royal entourage during their annual visit to Canada. So it is a bit of a catch-22 from the penguins point of view. The famous Canadian delicacy is called, 'Sanguin de Penguin Mentir.'

I hope this blog post has cleared up any misconceptions that you may have had about Canada.

Ezra Levant Solves Problem Of What To Do With Occupy Protesters -- There Are No Protesters!

2011-11-21T08:15:00.000-08:00

Pat Martin New F_cking NDP Leader?

2011-11-17T08:27:00.000-08:00

The choice has become clear in the NDP leadership race: Pat Martin, MP for Winnipeg center is the only obvious contender.

This is the leader that will make the New Democrats the governing party. He's decisive, analytical, and a brilliant communicator. Some of the policies that he'll introduce may be controversial. For example Martin hates youth. Last month he told the House of Commons that, "Every kid on the street (in Winnipeg) there has a bolt cutter so he can steal bikes."

Now, talking about the federal budget on Twitter, he has begun using the 'F' word.

Another Twitter user, @LettingSmokeOut intervened with...

'Sad how a foul mouth socialist capitalizes "Budget" but not "god" '

And Martin quickly responded with a very curt 'F' you.

The choice is clear for the NDP: Pat Martin is the man that will take Canada further into the f_cking 21rst F_cking century by defeating the f_cking Conservatives and that f_cking Harper.

What People Search For

2011-11-15T06:52:00.000-08:00

I often check the search keywords to see how people have reached this blog via Google. Here are some funny (and disturbing) searches:

bob rae naked

rob ford drunk with girls

christie blatchford and 'the boy' - 1980s

and, most sickening of all...

peter mansbridge

Politics In Quebec Explained

2011-11-14T09:48:00.000-08:00

CAQ: Birth Of A New Political Party!

Headlines around the world today are ignoring the formation of Quebec's newest party. The Coalition Avenir Quebec (or CAQ) was just an idea when it became the most popular option in the province. Boring the rest of Canada, CAQ is strangely similar to the ADQ but, at the same time, completely different. A former Parti Quebecois boss, Francois Legault, started it and it remains unclear who he was trying to get back at when he did. Legault, a former separatist, decided to put sovereignty on hold for maybe around 10 years. And, almost as if to counter, the PQ has dropped the mandate to hold a referendum on independence during their first term in power. What this probably means is that Quebec is now the most federalist province in Canada, beating out Ontario and P.E.I. for the title. Following the logic of politics in Quebec we can now only assume that Premiere Jean Charest, the most hated man east of Gatineau, will proclaim himself to be a separatist and try to unilaterally succeed while Pauline Marois, the leader of the PQ, fights to remain in Canada.

Jean Charest is the most hated premiere in all

of Canada... Expect Quebecers to name roads and

airports after him 30 years from now.

CBC Considered Hiring Ezra Levant To Shut Him Up!

2011-11-12T09:42:00.000-08:00

Access to information requests have revealed emails between top bureaucrats at the CBC on how to deal with the threat posed by Ezra Levant as he belittles the public broadcaster for costing taxpayers over 1 billion a year and having a left-wing agenda. The CBC vice-president of English programming even suggested hiring Ezra to get him on side. Obviously this wouldn't have worked as liberals have tried for years to shut him up to no avail...Or would it?

Rick Perry's Excuses

2011-11-12T09:08:00.000-08:00

Toronto Is Most Hated City In Canada!

2011-11-10T07:59:00.000-08:00

A Leger poll has found that Toronto is the most hated city in Canada. Nobody saw that coming.

At this time I'd like to draw attention away from Toronto by reminding people of a different Ontario town which never got off the ground. In order to do this I'll republish an old post from June 8th where I apologise for all of the various copyright violations I have committed while writing this blog.

The town's name is:

Sodom, Ontario.

Here's the post:

A Retraction and Our Sympathy

In stealing semi-copyrighted pics off of Tumblr and Creative Commons we sometimes make mistakes. On June 6th in a story entitled, 'Canucks Win Stanley Cup, Cow Predicts,' we used a photo without the realization that the six people in it have passed away. Our sympathy goes out and we apologize to their loved ones...

This photo was taken in 1888 in Sodom, Ontario at the Anti-Irish but Pro-Fenian St. Patrick's Day Barbecue.

1. Jeffrey Blacktooth lived for another two years but then hugged himself so hard that he imploded.
2. Fawnsworth Twilliger was later unmasked as not being from the town of Sodom but, really from Dildo, Newfoundland. He was hanged for treason.
3. Mr. Sanje Gupta was the first East Indian immigrant to the town. As such he was asked to leave. He later died of scurvy (strangely in the middle of Saskatchewan).
4. Ellis Davenport III is said to have disappeared after inventing a time machine. If true he may reappear on August 1rst of this year. However, many believe this is unlikely because his invention consisted of a hot air balloon, a giraffe, and 1000Ibs of dynamite.
5. Henrietta Sunshine lived for another 30 years. During World War 1 she became convinced that she could single-handedly defeat the Austro-Hungarian Empire. She was last seen walking through no man's land wielding a baseball bat.
6. Hugh-Jefferson Sunshine was so distraught by the disappearance of his wife, Henrietta, that he began to write and recite terrible poetry. The townspeople of Sodom eventually disappeared him, too.

2011-11-09T08:45:00.000-08:00

The most coherent occupy sign so far.

No Blood For Afghan Oil!

2011-11-09T08:26:00.000-08:00

It was that Cheney that gone and done that! Now he and Obama are laughing cause they got all the oil in Afghanistan.

2011-11-09T08:18:00.000-08:00

Does Taco Bell know that the Occupy movement has made this trademark violation?

2011-11-07T08:05:00.000-08:00

Marx, Lenin, and...Mao? Wait until the Free Tibet protesters see that!

Photo from: http://goo.gl/3RheQ

Canadian Teenaged Boy Impregnates 20-Year-Old American Woman!

2011-11-05T11:39:00.000-07:00

Word in the media is that a Canadian teenager has allegedly gotten an American woman pregnant.

I don't know who the kid is but, apparently he's some kind of celebrity-possibly on some CBC music show.

Canadians are currently saying, "Gosh, he shouldn't have done that," while smirking.

Toronto Maple Leafs Frighten Many!

2011-11-05T11:20:00.000-07:00

In a sign that the end times are near the Toronto Maple Leafs currently lead the Eastern Conference with 9 wins and 3 losses. If this luck continues it will be a clear omen that the world will come to an end as predicted by many in 2012. Should Toronto win the Stanley Cup by the conclusion of this hockey season expect fire and brimstone to rain down shortly thereafter.

Occupy Protests Spread To The Empire!

2011-11-05T10:50:00.000-07:00

Source: http://raisemyweapon.tumblr.com/post/12335754371

Canada Sends Boat To Help Ailing Turkey!

2011-11-02T12:36:00.000-07:00

After a 7.2 magnitude earthquake devastated Turkey leaving more than 500 dead and countless people homeless, the Canadian ship Tahrir will set sail for our Arab Nato ally. But Israel, up to their dirty tricks again, is undoubtably planning a blockade. The thing of it is is that the Israelis aren't too happy with the poor treatment Kurds are receiving in Turkey. They think that way too many people of Kurdish descent wind up being killed, tortured, or having to flee to northern Iraq where they're hunted down by the Turkish army. But hey, the Kurds don't have a state they can call their own so what are you going to do? Muslims control almost the entire Middle East so nobody wants to see Kurdistan get their own country.

Oh, now wait: I got that wrong. The Tahrir is really on course for Gaza...Enough said.

Ezra Levant Defects To CBC!

2011-11-02T12:05:00.000-07:00

After being critical of the public broadcaster for years Ezra Levant made a surprise move, replacing Mary Walsh as Marge Delahunty on, 'This Hour has 22 Minutes.' This video is proof.

Rob Ford Attacked By Crazed Transvestite!

2011-10-29T11:13:00.000-07:00

Rob Ford feared that he'd eventually be harassed by someone protesting his decision not to attend the gay pride parade. Then he saw Marge Delahunty outside his home at 8 A.M.

Prayer Forces Lesbians Out Of Tim Hortons!

2011-10-26T14:46:00.000-07:00

"I cast thee out, Satan!"

Two lesbians say they were asked to leave a Blenheim, Ontario, Tim Hortons because of a casual display of affection. A pastor complained and, they further claim, a prayer group quickly sprang up to pray for their souls.

Alec Baldwin: Hero Of The Revolution

2011-10-20T08:25:00.000-07:00

Aside from doing credit card commercials and hoarding lots of money as a successful actor, Alec Baldwin is part of the 1% that sympathises with the 99%. But some say that this is just political maneuvering: Rumours are that Baldwin isn't happy with just being part of the 1%. He simply wants more and more: Sucking up to the left is his way of trying to get his foot in the door as the next mayor of New York.

My Twitter Correspondence With Elizabeth May

2011-10-20T07:55:00.000-07:00

ElizabethMay:
Elizabeth May MP You know where oil sands companies excel? Advertising. On TV those guys are greener than Bambi.#cdnpoli

Me:
Bambi's dead. And it's important to remember it wasn't oil sands that killed her. TRANSCANADA: It's not like we killed Bambi.

ElizabethMay:
Bambi was a cartoon. And your ads are too. The wildlife killed by oil sands have not been Disney-fied.

Me:
Then what about all of the wildlife killed and misplaced by paving roads? Please stand up against the paving!

Superheroes Are Now Part Of The 1%!

2011-10-20T07:24:00.000-07:00

Pakistan Declares War On Little Girl!

2011-10-11T09:27:00.000-07:00

(Havelian, Pakistan) A 13-year-old Christian girl made a simple spelling mistake. While writing in Urdu, Faryal Bhatti misplaced a stroke with a dot.

What Urdu looks like.

Instead of writing the word, 'Naat,' which means praise, she had written the word, 'Laanat,' which means curse. The whole scandal about this is that she had been copying a poem about Muhammad.

After being beaten in front of the class the teacher referred her over to the principal's office and word about the spelling error quickly spread from there.

Now Muhammad may be an exalting and forgiving deity but, his disciples certainly aren't. Hundreds of protesters sprung forth demanding that the little girl be expelled and her family evicted from their home. Clerics are now voicing concern that the spelling error was really a conspiracy against Islam-this despite her tearful public apology.

And the Pakistani government has given in to the protests, evicting the Bhattis and firing the mother from her government job.

But now wait! With all of this going on how could Muhammad be described as anything other than a curse?

(More: http://goo.gl/nWkIU)

Occupy Wall Street Protesters Take Over Kitchener, Ontario!

2011-10-11T08:46:00.000-07:00

'Onkle Hans.'

King Street in downtown Kitchener remained closed all weekend as thousands descended onto the city. Probably to confuse law enforcement, demonstrators threw a parade on Monday complete with floats, marching bands, and polka music. I haven't been able to gather what the protesters want so their motives remain unclear. However, I have discovered that their leader is known as, 'Onkle Hans.'

Hans, which is probably an alias, wears a frightening disguise. And his disciples often dress in lederhosen and Bavarian hats with feathers in them. Clad like this they seem like a more fearsome foe than the Black Bloc.

By evening they become a drunken mob swilling Molson Canadian and partaking in such strange rituals like what they call, 'The Chicken Dance.'

People of New York: Your protesters were never as bad as this!

The Revolution Is Coming!

2011-10-08T10:57:00.000-07:00

Roseanne Barr in her past life.

The Occupy Wall Street Movement has begun to annoy many New Yorkers. But, as Karl Marx said, society moves in waves: So there may be a revolution for the thankless proletariat, and then a decline in revolution, and then another revolution, finally leading up to one led by Roseanne Barr.

In August Generalissimo Roseanne announced her intention to run for the President of the United States on the Green Tea Party ticket. This went largely unnoticed but caused some people to ponder whether she has actually had a cup of green tea in her life. But now the revolutionary hero has turned her attention to the protests, even calling for people's heads.

And this is all something liberal Hollywood has created. When some annoying fad actor becomes a celebrity and then they sink away into obscurity, sometimes they come back: 10x worse than before.

The revolution will be coming to Ottawa, Toronto, and Calgary on October 15th. They're leaving out Vancouver because they're terrified that some Stanley Cup hooligans may still be around.

Nikki Holland Stars In, 'Thank-You For Smoking'

2011-10-01T09:12:00.000-07:00

Liberals Plan To Win Ontario Election By Handing Out Free Smokes!

2011-09-30T08:08:00.000-07:00

Ontario Liberal Party operational vice-president Nikki Holland has been caught on tape explaining how she has done almost everything to get votes. Telling supporters that she'll deny it if quoted, she boasted about going to a homeless shelter to hand out free cigarettes. And deny it is exactly what she's doing: Holland is now claiming that what she said is based on things she's heard about how Conservatives and New Democrats have won elections in the past. Listen to the tape here: http://goo.gl/TbbWw

Voting Liberal never came with this kind of a buzz!

National Post Offends 6-Year-Old Transvestites!

2011-09-30T07:24:00.000-07:00

Outrage on Wednesday as the National Post ran this ad for one day and then pulled it amid calls of homophobia, biphobia, transphobia, and some possible hints of galiophobia and, also, maybe a bit of octophobia.

Enzo Loschiavo, advertising accounts manager for the paper, said that he received many complaints stating that, “We obviously don’t want to offend anyone, but we also understand that everyone has a freedom of speech.”

Here's a link to the group that ran the ad: http://www.canadianvalues.ca/SCC/

Asbestos Is Corporate Welfare!

2011-09-29T08:49:00.000-07:00

Noted member of the Liberal party Baljit Singh Chadha of Balcorp needs the financial backing of the Quebec government to keep the ailing Jeffrey asbestos mine open for business. Last year Canada exported 70,000 tonnes of the mineral/fiber to India. Mr. Chadra, who is originally from India himself, hopes to make a healthy profit by killing many of his former countrymen by dumping even more asbestos on their market.

Send an email to Jean Charest, Premiere of Quebec here: http://www.premier-ministre.gouv.qc.ca/premier-ministre/joindre-pm/courriel-en.asp and email Stephen Harper, the Canadian PM at: pm@pm.gc.ca to tell them to stop this illicit trade.

TV Ontario Sides With Fascist Japan!

2011-09-29T08:21:00.000-07:00

Last night TVO showed the documentary, 'ANPO: Art X War.' It's about Japanese artists frustrated with the military occupation of their land after World War 2.

Maybe they should have shown this instead...

Or this...

Or this...

Unlike what the Japanese did to the Chinese, Koreans, and POW's, what America did to Japan was invade and turn them into the economic power that they are today. And this certainly didn't benefit the U.S. auto industry.

But Frosty The Snowman Is Offensive To White People!

2011-09-27T10:53:00.000-07:00

Some experts in the UK are calling for drastic changes in that country's nurseries to combat racism before it develops in kids as young as two. Witches should be dressed in pink and classrooms shouldn't use white paper are just some of the recommendations: http://goo.gl/dY8Vj

Dick Cheney Invades Canada!

2011-09-27T10:30:00.000-07:00

Cheney and his entourage arrive in Vancouver.

The world's most evil man has stormed across the border into BC and is, reportedly, forcing his propaganda on humble west coasters...

Some brave people have risen up to show Cheney he's not welcome here. However, most protesters are unsure of why they hate him so much. But then, after all, he was Vice President of the United States: The most callous and wretched regime on earth.

Alberta Crushed By Fallen Satellite!

2011-09-26T09:02:00.000-07:00

Or that's something along the lines of what Sebastian Salazar led people to believe on Twitter last Friday night. While it turned out that NASA later released that the satellite had fallen into the Pacific, they said that they received calls from as far away as Japan and England asking if it had landed in Alberta. http://goo.gl/TBIA8

Saudi Arabia Bows To Pressure From Ethical Oil!

2011-09-26T08:33:00.000-07:00

Less than a week after the Saudi embassy wanted to kill the ethical oil ad which illustrated Saudi Arabia's poor treatment of women, that country has granted women the right to vote and run in municipal elections. However, since all elections are on the local level having all national affairs run by royal decree, this is seen as a small step. Women still can't drive cars or do much of anything without the permission of men.

The Saudis aren't thanking the ethical oil ad for their new stance. Instead they cite that after much research women have been found to be capable of rationale thinking and decision making. http://goo.gl/1NNa0

That's Disgusting!

2011-09-20T15:01:00.000-07:00

Ancestry.ca has found that Ontario's Liberal Premiere Dalton McGuinty and Conservative leader Tim Hudak are related. That means they're cousins! Then what does that make all of their MPs? ...Their six-fingered mutant offspring? http://www.canadanewswatch.com/top-national-stories/mcguinty-and-hudak-laugh-off-their-new-found-family-ties/

Saudi Lawyers Tire Of Trying And Executing Witches - Turn Focus on Ethical Oil Instead!

2011-09-20T14:43:00.000-07:00

Saudi Arabia is enraged by this ad portraying them as a bunch of woman haters.

Truth be known, it isn't as bad a country as it's made out to be. For instance, while witchcraft runs rampant and unchecked in most of the world, Saudi Arabia is almost free of it as practising it carries the death penalty: http://www.hrw.org/news/2009/11/24/saudi-arabia-witchcraft-and-sorcery-cases-rise

Barack Obama Wants To Eliminate Canada!

2011-09-17T09:38:00.000-07:00

As fears grow of a second recession, US president Barack Obama would like to add a 'buy American' provision to his stimulus proposal. http://goo.gl/Vy7lz This will effectively kill Canada and reduce us all back to working as whalers and seal hunters.

What does America want? First they like our oil, then they don't want it. Are they environmentalists now that want their Chevy's made in Seattle and their solar panels built in Buffalo, NY? Do they still want to expropriate our trees and our water?

But if this provision goes into effect then Canadians will have to take drastic measures. That's why we'll probably be having a...

Fire Sale! Everything must go!

We've got...

-Millions of employable people.
-Millions of used automobiles.
-Buildings. And not the kind that the world sees on, Road To Avonlea: Our bigger cities actually have skyscrapers.
-Forests, wildlife, and picturesque mountains.
-We've also got Peter Mansbridge: He could probably read the news in any foreign country.
-And much, much more.

Rick Mercer Promotes Homosexuality To Catholic School Kids!

2011-09-17T08:54:00.000-07:00

"Noted CBC homosexual Rick Mercer."

Noted CBC homosexual Rick Mercer is fuming over many Catholic schools decisions not to allow gay-straight alliance support groups on their campuses, saying, "any school board that will not allow them to start GSAs is completely ridiculous and absurd in a country like ours."

This blogger has a firm stance on this whole issue. While many devout people feel that they cannot condone a gay lifestyle because of religious beliefs, I say, "What gay lifestyle?"

Instead of being for or against gay-straight alliance groups, I simply don't believe that homosexuality exists. It's a gimmick that was made up by clever marketers sort of like Santa Clause or the Easter Bunny. And advertising execs have made a killing with it selling everything from designer underpants to Madonna CDs.

So go ahead and have your gay campus groups and be a corporate shill for the global underpants-Madonna CD consortium.

Hinterland: Who's Who - The Chipmunk

2011-09-12T07:33:00.000-07:00

My blog will now consist of Tim Hudak commercials and, also, constantly showing, 'Hinterland: Who's Who?'

Instead of telling the history of the Hinterland series, I'll just claim it as my own. I'm sure the CBC's copyright has expired by now. I filmed this vid when I was 8-years-old with a super-8 camera I found in the attic. Despite the excellent cinematography, it's interesting to note that the chipmunk is not real. Rather, it was one of my stuffed animals.

Tune in tomorrow as I lay claim to some more CBC history.

Jean Chretien Still Alive!

2011-09-08T08:36:00.000-07:00

Former Prime Minister Jean Chretien has awoken from his sarcophagus proving that he is still alive in some unearthly form.

File Photo: Jean Chretien

Our sources estimate his age to be at least 180. At first it was unclear what he wanted from us. CBC political commentators and analysts feared that he craved the blood of virgins and were wondering if they should sacrifice some of the newly elected Quebec NDP MPs to quell his thirst. Then it turned out that he has risen to endorse an NDP/Liberal merger. http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/politics/ottawa-notebook/liberal-ndp-merger-will-come-very-quickly-chrtien-predicts/article2155542/

Brian Lilley On The Ontario Liberal Immigrant Hiring Plan

2011-09-07T06:59:00.000-07:00

Why Didn't Anybody Care About The Soviet Polar Bears?

2011-09-06T07:11:00.000-07:00

With the Keystone XL Pipeline under fire and the president pressured to cancel the project, we draw your attention to the Trans-Siberian Pipeline...

It's alleged that in the early 1980s the CIA was tipped off that the Soviets were going to steal computer software for use in the pipeline. So they installed a trojan horse which caused an explosion of 3 kilotons of TNT. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Siberian_pipeline_sabotage

With all of the people protesting Keystone XL why didn't someone ever say anything about all of the poor Soviet polar bears who lost their lives?

Here are some more facts I've Tweeted about the Keystone XL Pipeline:

Fact: Homeland security finds penguins escaping brutality of Harper regime via Keystone XL.

Fact: Keystone XL does poorly as guest host on SNL: Spewing oil on everyone not funny.

Fact: Leonardo DiCaprio spotted making out with Keystone XL in busy restaurant.

Fact: Winnipeg Jets move back to Atlanta after Keystone XL destroys their arena.

Fact: Sex experts concerned of hot liquid spewing through massive pipe. TransCanada bankrupted covering Keystone XL in latex.

Leonardo DiCaprio Joins Forces With Daryl Hannah To Bash Canada!

2011-09-03T07:09:00.000-07:00

Protests over the Keystone XL Pipeline have caused celebrity leftists to come together and ridicule Canada as they'd prefer to get their oil from the Middle East.

On August 31rst DiCaprio Tweeted: Fact: The #KeystoneXL has sprung 12 leaks in less than a year of service.

While it is true that the first Keystone Pipeline has had twelve leaks, this should only put pressure on the government and TransCanada not to hurry the project: Especially when it is being scrutinized by radical celebs like DiCaprio.

Here are some facts about the pipeline I've been Tweeting...

Fact: Bigfoot sighted but then killed by Keystone XL Pipeline.

Fact: Oktoberfest cancelled in Kitchener, Ontario because people are already high from the fumes off of the Keystone XL Pipeline.

Fact: Homeless people now even more homeless because of the Keystone XL Pipeline.

Fact: Entire province of Saskatchewan now underwater because of the Keystone XL Pipeline.

Fact: 17 polar bears die as the Keystone XL Pipeline leaks oil all over the streets of Toronto.

Fact: The Keystone XL Pipeline has caused all penguins to migrate to Bermuda.

Fact: The Keystone XL Pipeline is wanted for a triple homicide in Moncton, New Brunswick.

Liberals Threaten To Send Kids To Summer School!

2011-09-02T09:28:00.000-07:00

If the Libs win the upcoming Ontario election they vow to introduce summer school for kids in grades 1 through 3 to help those that are having a hard time learning to read, write, and do arithmetic. http://www.thestar.com/news/canada/politics/article/1047831--liberals-promise-summer-school-for-primary-grades

This is a blatant, unfair attack on the weakest segment of society: Children! I remember being in grades 1 to 3 and summer holidays were the only escape from the adults who wanted me to read, write, and do arithmetic.

The sad fact of the matter is that kids aren't allowed to vote and won't be properly informed of Dalton McGuinty's plans for enslaving them in his summer education gulags.

On October 6th Vote Tim Hudak because learning to read and write is what high school is for.

More Important News!

2011-09-02T09:13:00.000-07:00

As the Ontario election race heats up, we bring you more important news...

In a previous post I predicted that if topless protestors continue to flaunt it, some conservatives would threaten to do the same. But instead of Rob Ford taking his top off, it was Ezra Levant: http://blazingcatfur.blogspot.com/2011/09/ezra-levant-full-frontal-nudityer-ezra.html

Are Canadians, led by some brave Winnipeg Jets fans, finally standing up against the awful music of Nickelback? http://popdust.com/2011/09/01/nickelback-canada-winnipeg-hockey-protest/

The Toronto International Film Festival may feature more nudity and debauchery than ever before: http://www.thestar.com/entertainment/article/1046189--tiff-reviews-43-films-and-counting

Ezra Levant Is Slowly But Surely Annoying Peter Mansbridge!

2011-09-01T07:24:00.000-07:00

Ezra Levant, on yesterday's episode of The Source, had some things to say about how the CBC illegally broadcast election results from eastern Canada to the west. He mocked news anchor Peter Mansbridge, showing a pic of him made out to be a crying baby. Will Mansbridge respond? So far he has not said anything about Ezra during The National. However, I predict it will eat away at him until finally...

Peter Mansbridge Trivia:

Q: What do Peter Mansbridge and Justin Bieber have in common?

A: Aside from the fact that they both live in Stratford, neither has a high school diploma.

T.O. To Become Monorail Capital!

2011-08-31T06:58:00.000-07:00

Just like Ogdenville, Brockway, and North Haverbrook, Doug Ford wants Toronto to become a monorail town. http://www.thestar.com/news/article/1046757

Here's video of Doug talking his brother, mayor Rob Ford, and Toronto city council into the plan...

Go Topless T.O!

2011-08-27T09:38:00.000-07:00

A group advocating for the right of women to go topless in public has been denied a permit to hold a demonstration in Ashbridge’s Bay Park on Sunday: http://www.thestar.com/news/article/1045136--group-denied-permit-to-march-topless It is already legal for females to walk the streets barechested however there are still issues with proper dress codes in public parks. If the event goes ahead as planned male protesters will don bikini tops to show the hypocrisy of it all.

But Conservatives don't want to see anybody go topless! And they have an ace up their sleeves: If everybody starts going topless then so will mayor Rob Ford: And nobody wants that!

Diefenbaker Procreated!

2011-08-27T09:16:00.000-07:00

A man named George Dryden is claiming that he is former Prime Minister John G. Diefenbaker’s son. Obviously, he can't be making any of it up. http://news.nationalpost.com/2011/08/26/man-who-claims-hes-diefenbakers-son-closer-to-discovering-true-paternity/

Diefenbaker, who was the PM from 1957 to 1963, is widely regarded as being the ugliest Canadian of all time. When he was in power he'd terrify people by coming out at night to prowl the streets of Ottawa saying, "Grrrr! Grrrr! I'm canceling the Avro Arrow! Grrrr! Grrrr! I hate the Canadian flag!"

Nobody would lie about being Diefenbacker's son.

I just feel sorry for the poor woman who must have been clubbed over the head by party staff and left at Conservative headquarters like a sacrificial offering so that Dief could have his way with her.

Failed Refugee Claimant? Win The Lottery!

2011-08-26T07:21:00.000-07:00

Proving that Canada is crazy, failed refugee claimants will be given $2000 as an incentive to return home. Incentive? Incentive? Where's my incentive? I didn't participate in any riots over the past year: I didn't get paid for that! So I fired off a Tweet to Tony Clement just to tell him that: I never hear back from Clement though. Infact, the only famous Canadian I've ever conversed with on Twitter is Ralph Benmurgui. To meander off topic, it went like this...

ralphbenmergui: I've been waiting for days. @ezralevant are you in favour of capital punishment?

(I butt in) me: @ralphbenmergui Not for oil execs but def for CBC employees.

ralphbenmergui: not sure what you're responding to but I haven't worked @cbc for 8 years. Great place, great people.

(At which point I say, 'Wow. Somebody is conversing with me on this computer contraption and it's not another Thai Princess claiming to be in a refugee camp in Nigeria? So I suck up).

me: @ralphbenmergui Just kidding! Saw all your shows on CBC in 90s + Your recent Vision show.

(Or read about his shows on Wikipedia).

ralphbenmergui: thanks.

And to sort of get back on topic here's Ralph interviewing two CBC immigration experts (circa 1992).

Now I'm going back to Twitter to Tweet this 1000x over: @ezralevant Ezra, are you in favour of gays on the CBC? In particular, Don Cherry?

Graffiti Artists Target Rob Ford!

2011-08-24T09:13:00.000-07:00

A new Toronto subway car was taken out of commission as someone spray painted things about mayor Rob Ford all over it. I can understand the compulsion to vandalise by scrawling symbols and words on public property but, Ford himself has vowed to clean up T.O. graffiti. It is unknown to us at this point what the vandal wrote on the subway car but, with even Ford's potential assassin admitting that he'd vote for him again, it all must have been good. So the next time your downtown with a can of spray paint in your hands and you want to write something nice about our mayor don't do it! Showing this type of support is not appreciated-even by Ford himself. Instead show your admiration by starting a blog or something: http://redhotrobford.tumblr.com/

Christie Blatchford Mocks Dead Socialist!

2011-08-23T09:29:00.000-07:00

The pundits won't wait for the state funeral before taking shots at Jack Layton's last words. In an editorial in the National Post, Christie Blatchford called Layton's death bed letter to Canadians 'vainglorious.' She continues on to deride the public outpouring of sorrow for Layton, saying that it's hard to separate 'the mourning wheat from the mourning chaff.'

All of this leaves me asking many questions. First and foremost: Who is Christie Blatchford? So I consulted Wikipedia. I didn't find a whole lot about her there. But I did find some stuff here and here.

If the information I found is true than Christie Blatchford's real name is 'Megaera' and she is one of the demons that Dante meets in the fifth circle of Hell...

File photo: Christie Blatchford

Canada Responsible For Wave Of Terrible 1980s Movie Remakes!

2011-08-22T08:29:00.000-07:00

Guelph, Ontario, is currently abuzz with the filming of a remake of 1990's, Total Recall. Things have gotten so bad with movies that filmmakers are recycling 20-year-old action blockbusters starring Arnold Schwarzenegger.

I may swing by the University of Guelph later today with my digital camera to shoot my own remake of National Lampoon's Animal House, and then head over to The Fat Duck to make 1988's Cocktail, later stopping by Breslau Airport to star in Top Gun.

Guelph could also use a remake of Dirty Dancing.

2011-08-22T07:52:00.001-07:00

EL CANADU Name Change

2011-08-22T07:19:00.000-07:00

It was always the objective at EL CANADU to become bigger than Canada's public broadcaster, the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation. However, despite some strong early gains, this Blogspot blog failed to bring in the volume of traffic of the CBC's site. So if you can't beat them, why not imitate them? Until we hear from the CBC's lawyers, EL CANADU will now become THE CANADU BROADCASTING CORPORATION, with the hopes of syphoning off some of their traffic.

Our old header

Everybody Likes Rob Ford! (Even His Potential Assassins)

2011-08-19T07:12:00.000-07:00

Everybody likes Rob Ford in Ford nation proven by Ford booster Anthony Vella. Mr. Vella, who has recently been charged with threatening the mayor's life, said that he voted Ford and would do so again: http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/Politics/2011/08/18/18572871-qmi.html

Gilles Duceppe: Man On The Run

2011-08-18T07:00:00.000-07:00

As Quebec swings to becoming conservative with the Action démocratique du Québec (ADQ) and the recently formed Coalition pour l'avenir du Québec (CAQ) looking like they'll win the next election, socialist and former separatist leader Gilles Duceppe took refuge in the CBC offices. For a while it looked like he would begin working for the public broadcaster. But Anglophones in the west weren't having any of it and were indignant that their tax dollars would go to feeding and clothing the ailing Duceppe. There's no word where he's hiding out now. Maybe he'll flee to a church and plea for sanctuary.

When Toronto Communists Attack!

2011-08-13T10:25:00.000-07:00

Councillor Giorgio Mammoliti is going to war with the communists that have infiltrated Toronto. This blogger says it's about time. T.O. could use a red scare. Then we'll enter a golden age where we build futuristic cars with huge chrome grills and fins and begin a space race with some foreign power (possibly Vancouver) to put a man on the moon.

Watch this eye-opening film on the evils of communism

But one commie has come forth to argue against Bolshevik bashing. Jordy Cummings, a PhD student in political theory, has stepped foward to admit to the National Post that his allegiances are with Marx and Lenin. Mr. Cummings said that many communists have helped build the city of Toronto and that, "There are schools, roads, and colleges named for various socialists, communists and anti-capitalists in history, in particular Norman Bethune."

Despite the fact that Cummings can't see the virtues of democracy and capitalism through his rose-coloured glasses, he is right: Many things in Canada are named after Norman Bethune: A commie. The only solution to this is to change a lot of names: Bethune College at York University could become, 'The Matt Cvetic Institute for Studies in Freedom,' and Norman Bethune Collegiate Institute can become, 'The Sam Steele Center for Patriotic Learning.'

Sam Steele was possibly flamboyantly homosexual in private but,

he was no commie!

But just how deep does the commie rabbit hole in T.O. go? Using Wikipedia this blogger has unearthed evidence that a long time ago (in the 1980s and 1990s) Giorgio Mammoliti was a member of the NDP and a union steward: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Giorgio_Mammoliti Mammoliti may, himself, be some kind of double agent deep undercover mole sent here to cause all kinds of trouble. It's something to think about.

This is a DoFollow blog

2011-08-13T09:35:00.000-07:00

So leave a comment for a link back to your site.

Rumours Are That Stephen Harper's On A Childish International Tirade

2011-08-11T08:22:00.000-07:00

There are rumours that while he was recently in Greece, Stephen Harper acted childishly when he wanted a second helping of dessert. Now a Brazilian newspaper is reporting that he locked himself in a bathroom and refused to come out because he wanted to have toasts before lunch rather than after. All of these reports are probably untrue as they come from very tabloidy newspapers. However, if there is some truth in them than there is a simple explanation: Under the leadership of the Conservative Party Canada is quickly becoming a major player on the world stage. Harper's alleged stunts have even Brazilian tabloids talking about him! Now everyone the world over knows who our Prime Minister is. This has worked in the past for Canada and it will work again. Pierre Trudeau use to mock and act like a dandy around the Queen, resulting in him becoming a minor international celebrity, and William Lyon Mackenzie King use to sit on a park bench for hours talking to ghosts until acting crazy landed him on the cover of, 'Time...'

Vic Toews Caught With Cocaine!

2011-08-10T07:46:00.000-07:00

The Minister for Public Safety, Vic Toews, set off a red alert at Toronto's Pearson airport because he had cocaine in his possession. http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/Canada/2011/08/09/18531986.html Trace amounts of the drug were found on a $20 bill he had in his wallet. So far it's being claimed that it's common to have small amounts of cocaine on currency and that Toews has done nothing wrong: A likely story. However, this blogger asks whether this is just a cover-up. Isn't it possible that the Minister for Public Safety is involved in an international drug cartel? Toews could be secretly going to Columbia and bringing back tiny amounts on $20 bills, slowly but surely amassing himself a fortune in blow. And where is Stephen Harper at this very moment? Columbia: http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/politics/harper-in-colombia-on-free-trade-deal-victory-lap/article2124857/?from=sec431 Isn't it a little strange that Toews is discovered with some nose candy in his pocket and at the same time the Prime Minister is making a trip to Bogota on alleged free trade negotiations?

Recess at the House of Commons?

Who Is Margaret Atwood?

2011-08-09T09:51:00.000-07:00

The conservative T.O. brother duo, Rob and Doug Ford, have made a new political enemy. And she's some kind of writer. As Doug gets to work wondering if he should figure out who Margaret Atwood is, loony liberals have been donning these freaky little Atwood masks to further confuse them...

http://www.flickr.com/photos/christostsirbas/5979925939/

Here are some facts I've compiled to help the Ford's out:

-Margaret Atwood writes books. They don't involve diamond heists, an impossible one-man siege with a lot of fire fights, or romps at the Play Boy mansion. Despite this there are still people who consider what she writes to be literature.

-Atwood isn't even a liberal because she urged Quebecers to vote for the separatists. See, read this: http://www.citizen.on.ca/news/2011-07-28/Columns/National_Affairs.html

-She was never dated Charlie Sheen, was never married to Tom Cruise, and she probably doesn't have a cocaine addiction. She's may be a big name in some circles but, she's never even done anything like pose nude on the cover of, 'Vanity Fair!' If Ben Mulroney hardly talks about her what's the point?

I Have A Sexually Transmitted Disease!

2011-08-09T09:03:00.000-07:00

British Columbia has launched a website that takes the stigma away from having to tell partners that you tested positive for something that Al Capone died from, and that they should get themselves tested, too. Now when you see something that looks like a birthday card from a former lover, it may really be...

Ontario already has the service in Toronto and Ottawa: http://inspot.org/

Who would make the best NDP leader?
	Thomas Mulcair
	One of those other people
	An animate carbon rod
	The dog from, 'Littlest Hobo'
	Bob Rae

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